My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
