He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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