so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
