nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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