the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
