That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
