i just wanna soil my oats bro
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
