Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
