If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
3pm strippers are depressing
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
