He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I want to fling myself into the sun
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
