Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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