is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
