I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
