So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
