Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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