Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Randomize
