i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
