I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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