My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
