I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
