I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
