Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
