help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
