I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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