Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
