...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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