Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm drive I can fine osifer
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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