Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
