I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize