well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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