I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
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