"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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