can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Drake has all the answers
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
