And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
i out mim tonsoeep
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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