So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
You're a waste of cheezeits
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
