If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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