The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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