That's intense
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
