We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Randomize
