Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
We left the knife in your bed.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
