Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
