Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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