During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
