Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Randomize
