I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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