he shaved USA in his pubs
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
