I queefed so loud it echoed.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
