I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
