bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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