why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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